mental health

Group of women doing squats in an exercise class.

Give it a squat for Lifeline

63 people die by suicide every week in Australia.

That’s why I’m taking on the challenge to do 63 squats a day in December. I’m hoping to raise some awareness and funds for Lifeline, a 24/7 Australian crisis support service.

Lee-Ann, a woman with long black hair tied into two French braids, points to the text on her dark blue T-shirt that reads "Hope starts with me".
Hope starts with me.

If you read Black and Blue, you’ll know Jade is struggling with her mental health. Even though the story is fictional, it’s no secret that I did draw heavily on my own history of depression and anxiety to get inside Jade’s head.

Lifeline helped me when I felt like I was completely alone. Now that I’m in a pretty good place, I’d like to help them continue to provide support to others. $39 enables a Lifeline crisis supporter to answer one call but every little bit is valuable.

Obviously money’s tight right now so I don’t know if I’ll be able to get people to sponsor me but I’ll give it a shot. And a lot of squats!

If you can spare a few bucks, please donate. You’ll be helping me feel better about the burning in my quads and glutes… but more importantly, you’ll be helping Lifeline save lives.

Here’s the link to the Facebook fundraising page: I’m completing 63 squats a day in December for Lifeline

You can also donate directly via my Instagram profile: @ leeannkhoh

If you can’t donate, consider sharing the fundraiser and maybe sending some words of encouragement. Like “keep going” or “get lower” or “biatch, you’re Asian, surely you came out of the womb squatting”. 😜

If you want to donate, but can’t do the Facebook/Instagram/Meta thing, let me know and we can figure something out.

Anyway, whether you can contribute a little or not, I know the festive season can be rough for people so do take care.

Aussies needing support can call 13 11 14, SMS 0477 13 11 14, or chat online. Internationals, please reach out to the relevant organisation(s) where you are.

Text reads: Support my 63 Squats a Day IN December to bring hope and save lives. Lifeline #Squats2SaveLives.
Sponsor the Lifeline #Squats2SaveLives challenge.
Text reads: The burnout bar. Background contains photo of a fuel gauge close to empty.

The burnout bar

Hey blog world. I’m not dead! Just really busy. And sleep deprived (yay for chronic insomnia).

But it’s the WA Day public holiday here in Western Australia, so I carved out some time to pen a few thoughts. And with “state daddy” Mark McGowan announcing his resignation as Premier and Member for Rockingham a week ago due to burnout, it got me thinking about my own breaking point.

It was late on a Sunday afternoon in the summer of 2012. I was in my friend’s car, and he was driving me home from the Scarborough pub that would later loosely inspire the Sherlock Arms in Black and Blue.

But that manuscript was still a while away. On this Sunday, I was just a girl in a car, crying because I had to go to my Toxic Job the next day.

I would continue to alternate between crying, nausea and total numbness every week until I finally quit that job with nothing lined up. I was still at the beginning of my career, but I’d always been quite anxious and cautious – so up until that moment, I never thought I’d be the person who left a job without a backup plan.

I realise many people don’t have the luxury of being able to do that anyway. But I did, I took the chance and I don’t regret it. I was burnt out and dying inside.

It’s been 10 years now but I did actually learn a lot from Toxic Job. Like how not to behave as a professional… Think workplace affairs between managers and direct reports, threats against ex-employees, exploitation of recent graduates less likely to know how to advocate for themselves, and just gross misconduct.

But more to the point, Toxic Job became my bar.

I have high levels of social anxiety and moderate levels of generalised anxiety. I find I have to put up with things I’m uncomfortable with pretty much every day of my life in order to participate in society. That’s just the way it is, and it can be exhausting, but I handle it.

However, Toxic Job is the standard I won’t walk past. If anything ever gets as bad or feels as icky as that, whether it’s in a professional or personal context, I’m checking out.

Writing-wise, things are moving pretty slowly but I’ve got two projects in the works: my second novel and a poetry collection. So that will probably be books 2 and 3 – I don’t know which will be ready first at this stage, but that answer should reveal itself in due course.